Babies - I admire them. They are powerful. I would be too vague trying to explain my opinion on them but yeah small people are cool -
So, I'm at the dentist waiting room the other day. I have never chuckled so much to a random thought.
There is the general stereotypical Mother talk. This can happen at the dentist, in tesco, the doctor, a cue about anywhere. But generally I've noticed women (mothers notably ) have such a broad and easy connection with other mothers. They engage randomly in open deep philosophical talks on life and anything and everything. They don't need to be friends, they just need to have the "being a mummy" thing in common. I think it's remarkable, and I love it.
-side note- I am both sexist and non sexist. Don't even start. Technically, it's sexist not to be sexist and vice versa. However, at root, I believe both sexes are equal. Now, the society we are subjected to causes women and men to naturally become stronger or weaker in just about everything. This is not to say that one cannot be just as good or even better than the other, but rather that they "usually" are.
Again, I vote equality, I assume a female would be much better at cooking than me. I do not expect her to be but I would definitely assume they are probably better at it than me.
Likewise its absolutely fine when they are not. It's this natural assumption that IS sexist, however, stereotypes exist because they are usually common and or/true. SO, In short, I prefer equality, non sexist, however the constant fucking crawl at societies understanding of the concept of sexism means that we are all naturally sexist. (look at how long it took for black and white equality - I'm not saying its ideal now but I'm comparing the group dynamic of everyone and how it develops and affects itself) Right. Side note over.
Dads. The dad waiting room talk it quite dry, usually consists of a sentence or two, and they will vaguely acknowledge things in the world. They still talk as they share the "Daddy" connection in common.
My example of this on two separate occasions.
Two Mothers at the Doctors
one mother looks at the others kid and INSTANTLY it's all " oh gosh they grow up so fast " and "isn't it interesting how the perceive" this and that, whatever, bam, next minute they've discussed most of each others lives on a general level and are onto a mature conversation stage of discussing more focused topics in depth.
This is over the period of 5 minutes.
Two Dads...well.
Start timer.
one notices the other HAS a kid. Ok. Progress. Eye contact. A supportive laugh as the kid gets a shape wrong in the small game of shapes he/she is attempting. The next minute its "how old is your kid?" "oh he's 7" " ah jeez they get so big so quick" "hyeah I know". I couple of respective nods and deliberate staring at kids later it's some attempted general talk, but it cuts short. The dynamics are very odd. It's like both men are trying to be silently dominant yet they want/attempt to be submissive and it's a game of who will open up more. And they're talking about soccer. Well, 5 quick minutes.
Scenario B is usually very similar to the Mothers, except men manage to cover some things very vaguely and avoiding each others business at top priority.
This is something I have usually witnessed. I'm not saying it's always the case but the vast majority happens as above.
Now, the Mother and guy, not married, sitting opposite waiting room talk
This dynamic is predicative to me, which is good.
The mother is playing around with her kid, peekabo, spinning him around the chair like he loves it. Well, he does. He giggles and smirks and hiccups. I should state this was actually a baby about 5-9 months old.
-side note- Babies are amazing when it comes to adult interaction. The innocent gaze of a baby at another adult. It is demanding. You are socially expected to say hello to the baby. You feel obliged, and of course you do. It's a mini human gaping into your direction. You cannot help but "E-louh" or "a- BOO!". Whatever it is you do it, because that is just what you do, when you're in a waiting room, waiting, when another persons baby looks at you.
The kid starts to look at the man opposite, ( on my side). I know whats coming. He will probably acknowledge the baby and the guy will probably exchange some basic words with the Mother, or show some body language of shared happiness ( Look at your baby ha ha cool, nice one)
Baby looks.
Time stops.
The man shuffles awkwardly by his newpaper, using it to armor against the powerful gaze of the baby.
Baby looks back at mom, "fucks this guy doing, he's not lookin', why ?"
Mom looks back reassuringly "He'll look don't worry, just wait."
Ok, baby goes for round 2.
Silence.
A few other people in the waiting room try to look at the baby to take the bullet for the ignorant man-
No, the paper trembles and lowers magnificently.
"Hello" he says to baby. This was more a statement than a hello.
Oh fuck.
Not only did he break the rule of acknowledging the baby and smiling and saying a couple of words but he just appeased the baby.
Silence falls upon the room
At this point I'm thinking fuck it, I can get the braces off another day, maybe I should get clear before hell breaks looks.
Mom looks DOWNRIGHT DISGUSTED on babys part.
Babys mouth opens a little, as if to try and respond the basic guesture.
No, the paper rises and the man dominates his glasses, continuing to read.
I shoot the baby a sympathetic look and then the mother accordingly just to cover my ass.
Baby wavers it, no, the man broke the rules.
The mother quickly grabs baby and tries to distract him, he doesn't need to dwell on it right?
No. Baby isn't having it. He plops off her lap and waddles unstably over to the man and prods just under his knee with a little bear from the box.
At this point I am genuinely worried about my safety.
Paper comes down, mandatory eye contact established, paper back up. Not a facial expression changed.
Well thinks baby, fuck this very much.
Baby goes back to mum and starts the ascent onto the small couch.
Well, everybody in the room began to beg with body language and empathy toward the baby. The mother picks up a magazine trying to play it off.
Baby breaks down the interactions and giggles accordingly to each, including myself, who EVEN pushed the toy truck towards his tiny feet.
I have decided that babies are not to be fucked with. They carry more social standing then anyone else. Which is pretty epic.
